Shed Ahead: Practicing and liking it

The conversation was about "The Woodshed"..
In the lexicon of a musicians world, to "Woodshed" means to go and practice hard. Supposedly it originates from people who would go into actual woodsheds for privacy and not being disturbed so they could practice, and hone their skills without being heard by others. So for us musicians "Shedding" or "In the Woodshed" is our serious version of figuring some musical ideas out, or working on something that is giving us trouble, and we need to drill it, so that it becomes muscle memory, and is flawless. It takes a tremendous amount of time, discipline, and energy to devote to the aspect of this because it is tedious sometimes, and repetitive, and full of moments of failing whatever it is that is trying to be accomplished. There are extremely frustrating moments when you believe that you have something down to a tee, only to discover that you only have a grasp of just an aspect of what you are trying to do, and not the whole "Enchilada". It is humbling and sometimes all consuming as you look for ways to reach inside yourself , and guide your mind and body to do what you want it to, because nothing is more frustrating than your mind knowing absolutely what it needs to do, but the physical nature of what you want hasn't caught up yet. I am using music as my ground zero for this idea, but "The Woodshed" although a part of music jargon applies to way more things than just music.

Everyone who has to execute something in some way, whether it be Music, Gymnastics, Skating, other sports, Painting, Writing, or an aspect of displaying some particular skill to others, or performance individually or within a group has their own particular Woodshed that they have to retreat to in order to get better at what they do. Everyone who does something like this has a particular level that they desire to reach and the woodshed is the place where that level resides. You have to know what that level is, and you have to be committed to reaching that level and understand when it is time to retreat to the shed where you can work on it. The "Shed" is not only a physical place, such as your room, a court,or some sort of practice venue, but it is also a state of mind that you have to reach in order to attain the tenacity and accept the repetitive nature of what you are doing in order to actually be able to repeat it again and again. Which means you have to like being in the shed, because despite what performance aspects you may come across, and how much you are able to take what you do and display it to others, most of your valuable time will be spent in the shed. In fact probably 90% of what you do concerning your craft will be spent practicing. If you don't practice, don't bother, because whatever you do will be short lived anyway. You have to not only want to be in the shed practicing, you have to actually like it more than the performance aspect because the performance aspect is the end result reward. The actual journey is the practice that takes place to achieve the reward, and the journey of getting better, and seeing what you can do is where you get the meat and potatoes of your craft. Liking the shed is crucial to expanding yourself, because if you don't like practicing, then you won't with any sort of conviction. And no conviction means no intensity. And intensity is not to be turned on and off like a ceiling fan. Intensity has to be there from the shed through the execution of the end result, but practice will  help you with the tenacious nature that you need to have all of the time, lying in wait..Not off, but turned down to a low volume, and blasted loudly when needed.

The shed has to be a regiment. A part of your lifestyle if you are going to be the best that you can be. If it takes an hour a day to be in the shed doing something, then make it so. If it takes more than that, or if it is once every two days, or once a week, you will make it work, if you are committed to doing what you set out. Whatever amount or frequency of time that you require to be in the shed, you have to do it. The Shed will be something that you not only want to do and like to do, but have to do, or else your equilibrium will be off, and you will feel that you have lost something. And the truth of the matter is that you will have lost something. You will have lost vital time to be better for your own sake. Not for someone else, or even in competition with someone else. In everything that we all do, there will always be someone better at something. The more you accept that, the more you can not focus on it, and just concentrate on the aspect of your own self, and what you need to do. Worrying about , and focusing on someone else and what they do, only makes you weaker, and takes your energy away from yourself. It is a backdoor empowerment aspect for someone else when you try to figure out what they are doing.

Whatever you do, your shed should be your shed alone. if you have desire, commitment, goals, and a belief in yourself, you will do what it takes to execute, realize your flaws, and go to the shed to focus. It is you who has to push yourself in the long run. People can motivate you, inspire you, and encourage with great support, but in the end you will reach a plateau, and a crossroads..Continue onward to get better, or settle, and be satisfied. There awaits the shed. To greet you with open arms or to be intimidating and something to be feared. Being in the woodshed is the happiest place to be because there is only one person to please. Yourself, and usually The biggest critic is ones self, but that is good because trying to be the best you can be for only yourself is the greatest feeling in the world. Make the woodshed a refuge, and happy place for yourself, and you will shine in the end, and even if no one on the outside of the shed notices, the person on the inside of the shed is the one that matters the most. Take him or her to the limits. The reward is you. ....And that is exactly how it should be.

In Like Yin: The balance of needed self love

It is not an easy thing in this world to walk around and feel good about  ones self. There are always people who say and do things to take you down a peg for no other reason than they feel they have to. All of us experience doubt about our abilities, our looks, our thoughts on things, and there are always people who capitalize on that simply because they need a boost in their own self esteem that seems to come from tearing others down. They seem to flourish from negative aspects, and revel in confrontations that involve trying to show someone just how smart they are. They will even announce that they are smart, as if to try to solidify this idea into their own mind, while at the same time telling others that they have no clue in life. For people to do this, there is something lacking within themselves that tells them they must divert the attention from their own low self esteem, and put the spotlight on some made up criteria that they put forth to mask one thing: They are in love with themselves, but don't love themselves.

Loving ones self is an important piece of life's puzzle. Once you learn how to love yourself, and yes it is a learned skill, you can go about the day with confidence, and not cockiness. Loving ones self does not mean megalomania. There are too many people who get this confused, the love of themselves is really an "In love" with who they see themselves to be, and not who they are. We as people are flawed, and fragile, and life's events can accentuate those flaws, and also crack the vase of who we are, spilling out all kinds of fears, doubts and questions about self. If you love yourself, you will be able to accept those flaws and try to make them better, or realize that it is part of you. Trying to improve ones self is a crucial part of loving yourself, because you are trying to be the best "you" possible. Not for someone else, or a situation, but because you feel that you deserve the best "you" that you can be. It is the Yin and Yang of our inner emotional works, where respecting who you are, and your differences from other people can help you to appreciate others, and respect them without feeling the xenophobia that too many people feel because they lump people into some hate filled stew, because they are different, or because they have a different perspective on life. Respect is the key word that loving yourself will generate because love is humbling, and loving yourself makes you open to new people, and you will want to see what they think about life because there is the acknowledgement that you don't know it all, so you will try to acquire as much knowledge as possible to improve yourself.

People who love themselves have an inner peace about them. They don't feel the need to announce how smart they are, or thrust their opinions upon anyone that they want to be in conflict with. When asked, they will tell you their opinion, and be more than happy to discuss things in an adult fashion without screaming, or idiocy, and if that person disagrees, then it is just as rewarding to excuse themselves from the conversation if it escalates, because constructive conflicts are good..Arguments are not. Those who love themselves do not have to begin every sentence with "I". It is usually not about them. It is about discovery, and the only way to discover is to listen. Those who love themselves never have to be right all of the time, and will accept the fact that they could be wrong about many things. Life is for growing, and those who love themselves always want to expand that particular horizon. They will also choose to surround themselves with people who respect others, and themselves also, because life is chaotic enough without others to perpetuate more chaos around you.

Those "In love" with themselves are in their eyes, always right, seem to be obsessed with proving people wrong, and are constantly seeking attention by conflict. Yes they will tell you that they love themselves, but in reality, if one loves themselves, there is no need to carry on in such a manner to build up self esteem. They are in love with who they see themselves to be which is not based in reality. That is why you have so many bullies that carry from childhood all the way through adulthood and seem to need to "prove" something to everyone. They will speak loudly so everyone can hear them, and surround themselves with anything that can keep their self esteem afloat, all in an effort to get people to see them the way they see themselves.
Is this a negative post? I don't think so because I am trying to promote the idea of people loving themselves, and then once that happens they can respect others, and judge each individual one on one. Being comfortable in your own skin, and who you are, means that honestly you will be less likely to be a loud mouthed idiot, which of course the world has no shortage of. Hatred of other people, blaming others for failures, and simple things like divisive conversations of opinion, would be curbed if people just loved themselves enough to be comfortable with the fact that not everyone thinks like them. Love and respect yourself, because you are the only thing that you own outright in the world. Do whatever it takes within you to face your flaws, be a good person, and have the Yin and Yang of your two sides live in harmony together. It sometimes will take half of your life to get to this point, but the journey of you is even better than the arrived destination. And once you arrive, you can look in the mirror, and say, "What's not to love?"

Insane In The Vain: Chasing and focusing on the right beauty

As some people get older in life, they face a tremendous crossroads that sometimes keeps them hostage until the end of their days here on earth. They spend incredible amounts of dollars if they are able, and tremendous hours of time trying to slow down or even stop the one  thing that they have no control over...Time. They will constantly look for ways to hold onto youthful appearances, and dwindle bank accounts trying to Botox something, tuck something else, get rid of lines here, or grey there, and putting a lift on other things that age naturally withers, and takes away. Now I am not talking about someone who has had a surgery and desires to fix a scar, nor am I talking about the people who desire to enter a gym, and exercise, or even develop a lifestyle of eating right. Those things will obviously help with the internal aspects of youthfulness in the long run, and believe it or not, they have a hand in keeping the mind sharp and focused. What I am talking about is this obsessive chase for maintaining, or finding beauty in the vanity of ones self. Insane in the vain. People lose their minds when they have grey hair, when they have lines in their face or when they see their parents in the mirror in the morning. The problem is that the beauty that we all should really seek is not superficial within someone's face, or on the edge of some plastic surgeon's scalpel. The beauty that we should seek is within us and around us.

This world that particularly us Americans inhabit is so unforgiving. The personal demands upon each of us is taxing, and the peripheral distractions of life and everything takes its toll on not only our external features, but it also jades and erodes our inner gauge for perspective. Because of the demands of people upon us, and us upon other people, we sometimes develop a distorted view of just what beauty is, because we  are always not only dealing with things on some sort of superficial level, but we are told by media, and by other people just what beauty is represented by. Look at any billboard from the highway, or any advertisement that comes up on the internet, and some person who is supposed to be beautiful is selling a product, or idea, or concept that their own personal beauty is supposed to be the guideline and standard bearer for. Instead of what is being sold, or put forth, it becomes now a beautiful person. This is where people get screwed up, because they begin to think that the superficial beauty of themselves should be the focus of how they will gauge worth, and value. Aging becomes an issue when it shouldn't because if we are fortunate, we will all age. Some better than others physically, but that's not where true beauty lies, or where one should want to stop the appreciation.

Beauty is everywhere. It was here before all of us were born, and it will be here long after we are all dead and turned to dust. Beauty exists in every single aspect of nature..It exists in  architecture, it exists in the sky, and at your feet.It exists as sounds in the morning and evening in the form of birds, and Bullfrogs, and Crickets, and it exists in the mechanical human made world that we go about doing our business in daily. Missing this beauty is our biggest crime, because it is so easy to see, and it doesn't take that much effort to constantly immerse ones self in it.

 The importance of acknowledging, respecting and stopping to look at the beautiful existing things around means that you put yourself in perspective. Yes one likes to look as good as one looks, because it's not realistic for me to say that we should not have any vanity at all. But when you realize that beauty is all around you, you will not be obsessed with your own physical shortcomings or perceptions of those. You will not compete with other people for beauty, and to compete with nature is just futile. So in a sense it frees you to focus on the inner beauty that you and other people possess, because you then acknowledge that there is something much bigger than you. And your physical beauty by certain standards becomes fleeting, and unimportant. You will not be preoccupied with fighting father time with expenses, because you will be too busy reveling in the beauty of other things besides your outer self. Appreciating the other beautiful things out there does wonders for your overall inner beauty because you have inside of you, respect, admiration, and appreciation for something other than yourself..And that in itself is beautiful.

The chase for beauty should not be one of vanity, but one of deeper beauty, which is worldly and inner. Why obsess and spend tons of money and time focusing on the the outer house of yourself, because when that goes, and you begin to give up attempts at perfecting some fantastical "look", you will realize that you never were in the scheme of things in the right chase. And it will be a sad day because of all the energy, time, and money that was spent could have been saved, and just appreciation for the true beauty of life, nature, and people could have possibly given you happiness, but instead you spent life worrying about crow's feet around the eyes.
Stop, take a deep breath, look and listen. You will see the important beauty around you, and it will absolutely floor you and leave you breathless when you try to take it in. It exists outside of not only your doorstep, but outside of your realm of regular appreciation of things. You have to step out of that box to accept the fact that beauty,and I mean true beauty has no boundaries, no age limit, no color, and sometimes no physicality. It is within you, and it is around you, and it is forever. And when you step out of that small box that we all sometimes seem to exist in and inhabit, and look at it that way, a mirror is the last thing that you will care about.

The Need...For Greed: The inner mess of excess

One of the first words out of all of our mouths besides "Mama" or "Juice", is the word "Mine". It's a word that we all learn to use to describe something that is of value to us, or something that really has no value other than the fact that as a child, something made us feel strong like a big person, and nothing makes a child feel stronger than the ability to claim possession of something. When we said "Mine" as a child, we finally had control in a world where we had no control, because we were told what to do, when and how to do it, and stopped from doing other things. So being able to say mine was a rare treat because it gave us a rare sense of power, and control, and even at that young of an age, in human beings that is rocket fuel for self esteem. As we get older possessions, and accumulations become essential as we are told to "Get" this, "Have" that, and that we must "Acquire" things in order to not only function in society, but to be accepted into it. We are bombarded with hidden, and not so hidden messages daily that say if you don't have a certain something, then you are less of an individual. So adapt the concept of "Mine" and plow through anyone that stops you from accumulating. The manifestation of this concept for many becomes one word, and one word only..Greed.

Greed is always one step behind most of us, as we are all guilty of accumulating just for its own sake. We take more than we actually need, because we are in the mindset of either running out, with the inability to replenish, or that someone will take that something away. Human beings are the only animal that develop the concept of mortality, so the idea of greed comes into play because people tend to believe that living life to the fullest requires having "stuff". Whether that "stuff" be money, material things, power, or where they live, the brainwashing is begun at a young age, and quite a few of us fall into the trap of "Mine". Because "Mine" means "Not yours" and what's mine is just that. In order for some to believe they have worth, they must have as much of "Theirs" as possible. The more they can get of theirs means that their lives are worth more. And this permeates into all avenues of their thinking. When it does, it just doesn't matter what aspect it is for that person, more becomes essential, and the feeling of getting that "more" leads to satisfaction. Not only satisfaction, but some insatiable lust where nothing seems to satisfy that individual. They must have the latest this, the greatest that, purchase more than they can possibly consume, and waste more than most people consume, just because they can, and they feel that they should not have to share a minutia of something that they have because everyone should according to them have the same mentality.

I am not talking about the desire to provide a home for ones self, or the pride of providing for ones family, or the goal of having a good job..That is not what I am referring to at all, because there is a distinct difference between supplying ones self because of personal need, and pathological acquisitions that go completely overboard. Greed turns people into sharks who smell blood in the waters, and will trample over anything and everyone to get something that they really don't need, but justify it by saying that it is their right to have it. There is only so much that a person can use, whether it be money, resources, land, food, or just personal items, but the person who is a slave to greed doesn't see it that way, and gets very insulted when it is suggested that they have enough already. Greed is a disease that really has no cure because acquiring becomes the gauge for happiness, and that euphoria of having and hoarding only lasts for so long until it has to be fed again. The true happiness that comes from existence is never obtained by the greedy individual, because existence doesn't define them. The word "Mine" does.

It's every person's right to be able to obtain what they want in life, and I won't begrudge anyone for trying to obtain whatever it is that they feel makes them happy. What I have a hard time with is the fact that most people who are slaves to greed, do all kinds of things to step over individuals who are helpless in their wake, who are in the eyes of the greedy one "in the way" of their progress. They will also deceive, lie, and manufacture deflections from themselves so that while others are preoccupied with pending situations, and looking at shiny objects, they can figure out just how to obtain something for themselves that is really unnecessary but acquiring, and having more, is the drug of their choice.

This is the reality of the world we live in. Greed is not limited to one group of people or one type of person. No one is immune to moments of greed, but what you can avoid is being a slave to it. It would be a wonderful world if everyone just took what they needed, or obtained just enough where they could function in whatever capacity they wished, but as it is, there are those where enough is just not enough, and the acquisition of more begets the desire for even more. And it is the concept of more that makes them feel somewhat immortal, and powerful. You can't take anything with you when you die, but greed somehow makes you feel that you are defying life's odds while you are here. The unforeseen price is that you are just creating a mess for yourself, as your existence depends upon actions, whereas people who are not slaves to greed can live, and not merely exist. And to them living, and breathing, and admiring the world and people around them, while trying to be good and honest is the greatest reward ever. Do they need things to exist, and live? Yes, but those ideas of what they need for themselves and their families are more based in the reality of usage, rather than storage.

My point about this blog is to point out that greed is a negative condition (or vice) that has caused more chaos in history than any other of the "7 cardinal sins" all because it always revolves around the action of taking something that has the word "Mine' attached to it, even if it wasn't yours to begin with. Because if it wasn't yours, it belonged to someone else. And we all know what happens when two entities claim ownership of something. Someone wants to take, and someone has to defend. It's harsh, it's never ending, it's powerful, and it cannot be stopped no matter how hard we all try. It's greed, and for some people, it's what's for dinner..
And it all starts with the word.."Mine".