Thursday, July 7, 2011

Flip Flop Fly: Contradict until we die

Hypocrisy is a part of human nature. We are all guilty of it, and we all do it at times known and unknown to ourselves. We as human  beings, and adults in particular are products of the combination of nurture, nature, and received information, and experiences. These things shape our philosophies on life, our perceptions, and assessments of situations, and our actions and reactions concerning attitudes and beliefs about others. No one thing gets outweighed in influence, as each item checks and balances the other shaping us into who we are. And often times it really is that saying "Child is father to the man." Our youthful experiences really do end up shaping us as adults, and we constantly are in a battle with our younger selves to break free and become independent.

All of that said, we are constantly walking contradictions. Hypocrites who sometimes say one thing and do another. Hypocrisy is at the core of our being as often we try to stick to behavior, beliefs, and ideas that are consistent with the way we view the world, and will not interfere with what we perceive as a divided mindset. This desire to be consistent comes from the notion that two or more trains of thought equals weakness. The weakness does not come from having two or more trains of thought. The reason is, that it is impossible to be completely consistent. People's ideas change, grow, and take significant turns from where they once thought before. We are children of our beliefs, and are slaves to our emotions and that often times than not rule our logical roost causing the hypocrisy. But that's ok, because we are perfect human beings which means we are imperfect. So hypocrisy is not the weakness. The weakness is this...Refusing to acknowledge the hypocrisy inside you.

Example: There are two people in your life that you know. One whom you like, the other that you don't. The one that you don't like makes a statement, that rubs you the wrong way, and you say that you don't like it. The one you like makes the exact statement, and you have no problem with it. You actually agree. There is the hypocrisy that you possess. The only reason that you have a problem with one person, and no problem with another for the exact same statement is for one reason only. You don't like one of the individuals. There is nothing wrong with that if you state that reason. That is being completely honest, and honesty trumps hypocrisy. Refusing to see it and acknowledge the evidence of hypocrisy makes for lack of credibility, therefore the illusion, and presumption of weakness. By just saying " I don't like what person A said because I just don't like him and can't bring myself to agree with him" makes you honest and human, and even though there is hypocrisy, you are strong for being honest with yourself. Therefore garnering respect from others because they will say about you, "Yeah so and so is a hypocrite sometimes, but so and so will be the first to tell you that and why."

Nowhere is this more prevalent and out in the open than politics as we watch on an almost hourly basis politicians from every venue on every ideological side contradict themselves, twist and turn their own words and others, and become hypocrites in the name of votes. They posture, lie, and do the opposite of what they said, but that is not where the problem is. The problem is that they don't acknowledge it. If they mess up, misspeak, put themselves on a pedestal, or flip flop, the failure is ignoring it, and not perhaps saying, "I know I said that, or did that, but I changed my mind, or I made a mistake, or this thing I did doesn't match what I said, but here's why I said it." That is being honest, and people may not like the outcome, but they will respect the honesty. This goes for folks who are not politicians whose ideology rules their line of thinking about politics. I firmly believe that given the choice between acknowledging hypocrisy, or an ideological stance, people will choose ideology because it's easier than saying, "Yeah I see the hypocrisy, but I stand with this side anyway." That is honesty, and that is not weakness. It is truth and when folks face the truth about their beliefs and their contradictions everyone deals with each other better, because there are no head games.

There are no completely consistent angels out there, yours truly included. If you think you are completely consistent and not a hypocrite,then you are fooling yourself, and part of the problem of why people don't like hypocrisy. But the truth is that hypocrisy is actually OK. As long as you recognize it, and call it what it is, and not sugar coat it. Hypocrisy makes us well rounded because it constantly keeps us evolving, and questioning ourselves, and how we see things, and any time that happens with folks it makes for better human relations with one another, agreeing or disagreeing. Taking responsibility for the contradictions and hypocrisies that we all have will actually in some strange way bring people together...As honesty always does.

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