Hopeless Semantics: Presentation is everything

I love words, and how they are put together, and I love to listen to how people talk and arrange their thoughts in a manner of expressing themselves. And I love to see how folks write, because when you write you have an even better opportunity to express yourself because you can now arrange and see how your thoughts actually look, without the disadvantage of them traveling from your brain, and leaving your mouth too soon to be constructed fully. Everyone wants to convey their thoughts, because everyone has something to say about life, a subject that they are passionate about, a gripe, or just their own particular brand of philosophy as it pertains to how they think or carry themselves. To convey these ideas, everyone needs to only do two things..Know what you are talking about, and say what you want to say without flying off in tangents. Those two things are the keys to getting your point across, and informing folks of what you want them to know. With those two things in place, you have a fighting chance of credibility in what you say..Here's where the peripherals and nuances of Semantics come in.

I have a good friend who says, "Life is way to short to mince words". So he doesn't, and sometimes it works and other times it turns people off because he has thrown away the filter that we often use to determine whether or not it's a good idea to say something a particular way, or even at all for that matter. The same filter that makes us uneasy about telling a dirty joke in front of a person of clergy, or swearing in front of elderly people. The old saying that you get more bees with honey, than with vinegar is true, but you have to know what each person, or each situation's honey is. A comedian or musician must know their audience, to maximize their performance, and the same has to be true with us everyday in our lives trying to get our point across. Knowing your audience is understanding how each person or group of people that you try to relate to likes things presented, and said to them. We have to perform these subconscious acts like this on a daily basis as we negotiate ideas with co workers, spouses, your children, or friends. You begin to understand how things need to be said, to get the most bang for your buck with each particular situation and player. Some folks work best with subtlety, some prefer crass balls out honesty, and still others require a that you sell them an idea or thought like a used car. Use the wrong tactics on the opposite folks and the conversation won't go well.

I guess "tactic" would be considered a wrong word here but there is the semantic operative at work. It really is a tactical operation dealing with folks on a daily basis, and the different semantics and presentations do not make you phony at all. It just makes you aware of who you are dealing with, and in order to have great communication skills that is something that needs to happen. You need to be able to speak your own language, and not lose yourself, but also speak the language of "Identification". Which is having people relate to you, and you validating them also, as you relate to them, and how they present, and want things presented.

It's very important to not lose yourself in this process, and keep your core values and ideas intact and not change what you think in the process of guile to make folks agree with you. I am just talking about the semantics of approach and conversation, and not succumbing your way of thinking to accommodate others. There will be times where even if you do everything right by a particular person's playbook, that they won't be receptive to congenial back and forth. You can't win them all, and the goal is to not win them all anyway. The goal is to share. Share what? Ideas, thoughts about the world, debates about different things that you believe in, or just suggestions about codes of conduct in life in general. The exchanges and dynamics of conversation, whether they be written or vocal, can be frustrating because people will not stick to the subject, go off in tangents, or just take what you say the wrong way because your semantics weren't in line, which screwed up the presentation. We are all creatures of habit, and we have all developed our particular nuanced way of presentation, and interpretation, which means that it is sometimes in direct contrast with others. The thing we have to do is acknowledge this, and try to communicate anyway.

Even if the lines of communication get screwed up, let there still be communication. A society without communication between its people is doomed. On a smaller scale, that goes for friendships, marriages, back and forth between acquaintances or strangers, or even people that have completely polarizing ideas. In this stew of communication, semantics can be the success or failure of at least a decent exchange of ideas where there is an agreement to disagree. Learning semantics may not always get your point across the way you want it to. But it will certainly make you a better presenter of those ideas. Know your audience folks, and your audience for better or worse will respond.